You and your spouse have decided to call it quits on the marriage. You've hired an attorney and are ready to begin the emotionally and mentally draining divorce process. But what about your kids? How do you make this transition easier for them? Nesting may be good solution.
What is nesting?
Nesting, also referred to as bird nesting, is when the kids stay in the marital home during and after a divorce. You and your ex-spouse then take turns living with the kids. Usually parents find an apartment, motel, or other residence to stay in during this arrangement.
So, why could this be a better option? Below are three reasons nesting could be the right fit for your family.
1. Beneficial for the kids
The kids' lives are already about to be disrupted in a big way with the divorce, but nesting can help with the transition. Nesting can add stability to the children's lives. Here are some benefits:
- Life is less disrupted - They're staying put so they'll still be with their friends, attend the same school, use the same bus route, and more. You won't have to figure out a new schedule for them. The only thing that will change is which parent is spending time with them that day.
- One home - If children stay in one place, that means they keep all their stuff there, too. You won't have to worry about them forgetting their favorite toy, clothes, homework or anything else at the other house. It's all right there.
2. Keep the cost down
You know that kids do a great a job slowly burning a hole through your wallet. Nesting can help keep that cost down. If you can afford separate residences for each parent while also financing the house the children live in, the extra expenses of having two sets of everything are eliminated. Plus, you won't have to contact your ex to see if something was left at their place.
3. Sell the house when they move out
Your children are grown and ready to move out. What about the house? You can sell it and then split the profit with your ex-spouse depending on what you agreed to in the divorce. There's a good chance it's gone up in value since the divorce, too.
Not for everyone
This living arrangement won't work for everyone. Many divorced parents want to see as little of each other as possible, and things can get even more complicated once new partners start coming into the picture. Privacy can also become an issue with nesting. But, if you can amicably co-exist in some way, even just temporarily, then nesting can be great way to ease your kids into their new life.